It was in mid-January last year that I heavily cried inside NAIA. For the first time, I’m watching my dearest Stephanie leave the country to look for greener pasture to be a Nurse in UK. I’ve never imagined myself getting physically separated from her. I love her and would want her just beside me but also I want her to fulfill her long time dream to work outside the country. In January, I welcomed myself to the world of LDR (Long Distance Relationship).
It’s not easy but I believe that despite the distance we can still be there whenever we’d like to be. The past year has been quite different – it’s the opposite of our usual routines and escapades. I missed our Chingkee Tea moments, our monthly dates at Bigby’s, our nightly walk in Divisoria, our late night Siomai sa Tisa snacks and our out of town trips. It’s not easy being in an “LDR” relationship but I took it as a challenge as I believe that “Love is a choice and not merely a feeling.”.
I have been hearing a lot of stories about LDR and how it has ruined a lot of relationships but I still believe that it all matters with our choices. Our choice to love. Our choice to communicate and our choice to nourish it. I tell you – I don’t believe in these stories anymore (at this point) as I see that technology would fill a certain small gap in that area. You may not be physically there but at this time – it’s a lot easier to communicate with our loved ones across the globe.
Here are tips for you to utilize technology to strengthen your relationship:
- Agree for an app for both of you to talk and see each other. For Apple users, go for Facetime or Facetime audio. If you have an Android phone, go for Google Hangouts or Facebook Messenger.
- Establish talk time. It may not be easy but a little sacrifice will go a long way.
- Communicate your challenges and schedule changes.
- Setup calendar viewing. Steph shared her work calendar with me on Google Calendar and it automatically alerts me if she has work, if it’s her off or her training day. Again, check it daily. There has been times that I have called her early in the morning when in fact it’s her day off.
- Send photos of your day to day activities. During her latest holiday travel to Edinburgh in Scotland, she sent me probably more than 50 photos of her whereabouts. Which I appreciate – it’s like I’m on the same trip with her.
At the end of the day, it’s all about choices – a choice to love and continue loving. Technology helps. Utilize it. Try it.
This article was first published on my weekly column “VICMADZ” on Urban Life – Mindanao Gold Star Daily – the biggest newspaper in Mindanao.
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